In Prayer Tonight

with David, Lee and Greg for the Basileia Community the Lord gave me a picture of a man standing on a ladder at a broken wall industriously rebuilding the wall. Then I heard the Lord say very clearly "A repairer of the wall" ... Lee then grabbed his Bible and read out of Isaiah 58 which totally fits and I believe is a heart cry of the Lord over our community in this season.

"If you do away with the yoke of oppression, with the pointing finger and malicious talk, and if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday. The Lord will guide you always; he will satisfy your needs in a sun-scorched land and will strengthen your frame. You will be like a well-watered garden, like a spring whose waters never fail. Your people will rebuild the ancient ruins and will raise up the age-old foundations; you will be called Repairer of Broken Walls, Restorer of Streets with Dwellings. Isaiah 58: 9-12

Christmas ...

As of last night the TREE IS UP! I decided if I was actually going to buy decorations that I need to make the most of them ...so, literally from the store to the floor did my tree go with enthusiasm and vigor I perfected the highly flammable plastic decor. Perhaps, one day a real tree will grace my humble abode.


Today Anita, Maria and I went right into the heart of Hollywood to hook up with a lady named Rachelle.

Rachelle is a homeless lady who we encountered last Sunday right after the GIG who had fallen into the middle of the street. She and a friend of hers, Angelina came over for Thanksgiving Dinner the other night and as I was sitting right across from them had quite an interesting conversation. The skills of manipulation for the sake of survival these ladies have developed is quite fascinating and sad all at the same time.

Speaking of sad -wow- Hollywood ...so many mentally unstable, broken, lost and lonely individuals. Definately not what you see on the movie screen.

So, today Anita, Maria and I sat in some pizza joint right on Hollywood Blvd. listening to Rachelle. It is all apart of the journey into relationship. I love it cause it is so much more than just a cup of coffee or a free meal. It is really sitting and listening to the heart of a woman who has been living in LA for 17 years. A woman who is struggling to live, looking for hope, love and life.

Please pray for Rachelle and Angelina that we will have the continued honor of encountering life with these ladies.

Ok - gotta jet - Bailey is jumping all over me obviously looking for some entertainment.

Peace Out

Thanks Katie ...

Open Me
Written by Shawn McDonald

Would You open up eyes, so I can see
Would You open up my ears, so I can hear
Would You open up my mind, so I can know
Would You open up my heart, so could love You more
I want to serve You, my God
I want to give everything
I want to serve You, my King, yeah
I want to serve You, my Lord
I want to give You everything, yeah
Here I am with my arms open wide
Asking for You to come up, up inside
Won't You make me new, won't You make me true
Jesus, won't You make me like You, oh
Will You touch my eyes so I can see
Will You touch my ears so I can hear
Will You touch my mind so I can know
Will You touch my heart so I can love You more
Won't You open me
Won't You open me, open me
Won't You open me, open me
Won't You open me, open me
Won't You open me, open me

American Thanksgiving

Today is American Thanksgiving. WOW. Do they celebrate it down here ... as big as Christmas, for some -they tell me- even bigger. There was a whole gang of Basileia posse over at the Ruis' tonight for a feast of a lifetime. Seriously... good thing I just joined the YMCA up the street.

I have a whole bunch of stuff in my heart as of late and have no clue where to begin. Still processing. Yes, for those of you who don't know me well, I am a processor and feel things very deeply (this is my sensory/tactile side) so-as much as most of you know me as the extrovert self that I usually am. There are many days that I just need to be able to walk some things through from my heart with the Lord.
Tonight is one of those nights.

I don't really have anyone to do that with in the flesh - who really just 'get me', the way I think, the way I feel, without having to explain or at times over explain. Many days I just feel very alone yet, I also believe it is a place that the Lord has created in me and for Him, that only He and I can go to. Much of it -will never hit this site, as much as I would love for it, cathartic and all. That to me is still the scary part of this whole blog concept. The unsafe part.

Sometimes I wish that i didn't "feel" as much as I do. I have always been that way since childhood. The slightest word to the loudest statement. A look to an unresponsive nudge. I wonder why do I need to "see" and "feel" all these things...
Something feels unsafe right now.

Yesterday, I wrote in my journal that "I feel surrounded by partial/ conditional embraces, which are so contrary to the Father who holds His arms wide open as far as the east is from the west. To embrace us as His son, His daughter, with an unconditional embrace."

'Say the right thing', 'Have the right look', 'Offer the right gift.' 'Just BE the right person.'

"A partial embrace appears like the real thing until you are wrapped in it. Yet quickly, feel the coldness, the empty promises with no commitment contaminating the voice of the one who is there as the giver and receiver."

My heart is longing to find myself constant in the unconditional embrace.

Father, my heart longing is to be one who embraces like You. Willing to go to the dark places, hear the pain, walk out life together. Free of all the conditional stipulations subtly or blatantly we put on one another. Truly desiring to understand the meta narrative of the different ones whose face I look into each day. Growing in love, understanding, mercy, patience, kindness. Slow to speak and quick to really listen.

:A few quotes that have captured my attention as of late:

"Injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere"
(Martin Luther King Jr. a letter from a Birmingham Jail, April 16, 1963)

"Community is an alibie for a failure of individual love"-Leonard Cohen

"Comprehension is not a precursor to obedience"-Film 'The Matrix'

"True Freedom is whom or what you choose to be enslaved to"

"Those who say it can't be done shouldn't interrupt those who are doing it"

"We judge ourselves by our intentions and yet we judge others by their actions"

"I'd like to live like a poor man with lots of money"
-Pablo Picasso

"A little bit of evil for the greater good is still evil"
-Sheri McConnell

Thought for Today

After getting up at 6:30 am this morning for no special reason other than to let Bailey do his morning pee on the mini palm tree on my patio (thought to self - I should water that tree at some point) and then of course another reason I am up so stinkin' early cause I had gone to bed at 8:30pm the night before. ok -I was exhausted from my trip. I think I am back to normal ...as normal as I get anyway;)

I decided to throw in the movie "Kingdom of Heaven" with Orlando Bloom. ahhh...a lil' early morning pleasure - good coffee, a bowl of cereal, sitting in my pj's in my chocolate chenille throw watching a movie with no rush to the morning (kinda feels like a christmas holiday treat)

...anyway...

A thought for today emerged in me as I watched this movie and here it is:
"A little bit of evil for the greater good - is still evil"

Fascinating how human nature enjoys justifying the small compromises for the sake of the perceived better, best or greatest.

:My prayer today:
Lord, please purge and refine the smallest justifications in my heart which will so easily contaminate the beautiful work of Your Heart in my life.

Quiz

Thanks Raeh for the "middle earth quiz". Here are my results


Numenorean


To which race of Middle Earth do you belong?
brought to you by Quizilla

If you want to also take this test click on: "To which race of Middle Earth do you belong?" above

Side note: mmm ... feels eerily prophetic in a bizarre personality way ...

sunday -oh what a day!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BARB!!! Lots of Love from me to you across the miles xoxoxoxox

today was a good day. it didn't start off that way but, turned around. Here comes a story ...

Last night around 1am as I sleepingly unpacked my suitcase from what was a really long day. I just arrived back home from a two and ahalf week trip to Canada.

I was warmly greeted by my oh so comfy bed - clean fresh smelling sheets. (By the way this truly is one of my favorite earthly smells!) and my lil' baby Bailey cuddled up around my neck/head. ok -don't ask - that is the usual 'sleep position' he likes to have with me. That will most definately have to change when i get married. Anyway, on to the story ... About half way through the middle of the night. right during REM (im sure) in the middle of a good dream anyway, I heard this taptaptap and variations thereabout right above my head on my bedroom window. My bed is right below a window (which I am on ground floor)it was loud enough to wake me up very slowly as the little white puff ball curled up into me started quietly growling. Again... taptaptap... the sound emerged even louder this time sounding alot more urgent and Bailey's growl intensified as I could hear the window trying to be unlodged from it's closed position. I started panicking in a semi (not even) concious state. I must explain. I am not a morning person or do very well when woken up from a dead sleep. I wasnt thinking clearly at all. I jumped up out of my bed thinking "someone is trying to break in" I have to keep the window closed - I cannot let them in. I was freaking! finally, I whipped the blinds up and saw this mass of a person trying to scale the rocks below my window endeavoring to climb through the window. Of all things, I actually scared them when I threw open the blinds and started screaming at the top of my lungs "GET OUT OF HERE" "GET OUT OF HERE" over and over again. I honestly, don't know how many times I yelled it. Remember I was in a daze. When this person looked up at me - I noticed it was a girl who started saying back to me frantically, "I'm sorry mam, I'm sorry miss...i'm sorry." I thought that someone else lived here. I didn't take that for any sort of apology but, just kept yelling "GET OUT OF HERE!" I can justify my psychoticness by the fact that I was so startled and freakin' scared! This person quickly removed herself from the face of my wall and ran off. I ended up trying to sleep after that and needless to say was fairly disconbobulated. Which then at 5am Bailey decided it was time to get up for a morning pee. I definately was not going to go over to our park, but again stumbled out of bed to let him pee on the one teeny weeny palm tree that I have on my patio. I could care less at that point. and then he kept waking up every hour on the hour until 8am I finally tried to pull it together to head down to Hollywood for our monthly GIG event.

THERE'S A STORY FOR YA' EH!

I was looking forward to seeing a few people this morning and yet, a huge part of me was just wanting to sleep in but,knew that would be virtually impossible so, I pushed through and said to myself let's make this the best. I walked in and was automatically greeted by warm smiles, hugs and a few familiar faces. It actually felt really cool. I felt a little thrown coming back from my fun adventures in Canada to not really knowing what I am coming to here. and yet, today it felt really good. I had a few convo's with some really cool people and actually collected quite a few phone numbers who I am going to pursue to just hang and get to know each other. Jason and Jennifer live in long beach and are so cool. Jason is honestly an amazing worshipper and his wife jennifer is so beautiful! I really feel a connect with her and look forward to a new friendship. Plus, I met this really cool young couple who live right in Hollywood and have moved here from Texas just a couple years ago following the voice of God. Another Jesus Connect I feel is emerging. Thank you Lord. I have really been praying about this and you are giving me hope. Thank you!

I hooked up with another few friends to set up some coffee dates and then in the middle of worship (which was absolutely amazing!) All my Canadian friends -you really need to come to just be able to be apart of this worship stuff going on! Amazing! And I could hear the voice of the Lord so clear directing me to pray for people -stealth like. No recognition, not up at the front, just weaving through the crowd as He directed. I really could see the Lord so clear on people and had an opportunity to see freedom over a beautiful girl who was so broken. The Lord gave me a picture for her about her being a bird with beautiful color who had her wings bandaged up and could not fly because she was wounded. He healed her heart this morning as we prayed and in an act of beautiful obedience she then drew a picture of a precious bird flying free in the air with all her color and beauty to display!
It just so encouraged my heart!

My heart is filled with hope in today as I really saw you Lord answer some cries and concerns of my heart as I have launched out into the total unknown, not knowing how this all is going to unfold. In light of american thanksgiving -which is this week and honestly, so bizarre - almost bigger than christmas! David was speaking about "contentment" today and I just felt challenged today to remind myself again that I bring myself back to that place of contentment in HIM. As I keep placing myself there - He will direct my path and fulfill the longings of my heart.

I choose to trust you Lord, my saviour, my master.
Tommorow I might head down to the beach (it has been HOT here- like 27 celcius!) I need a day off and with a freshly filled tank of gas should go and have a new adventure. Even alone I will find intimacy - with HIM.

tired

I am coming to a close of my 17 days in Canada. Tommorow I head back to the land of population ...that's right Los Angeles. It still feels somewhat surreal that I actually live there and I must say I so miss Bailey! I can hardly wait to see him tommorow and my mom and dad!!!

This has been a good trip. Loads of people time -it has been awesome! Looking forward to my quiet little so cal apartment in the foothills of LA, walks in the little park with bailey and new adventures to unfold. I already miss all you very dear people to my heart, who I have hung with for the last couple weeks. It makes me sad to wonder when the next time will be. There were many of you I wish that I could have seen on this trip - Kevin Deane, Mark Sears, Laurel and many others.

Odd how when all of a sudden we are taken completely out of every comfortable place we realize how settled we really were and the relationships that you are blessed with. I am staying with My brother and family tonight before I head off. They are so amazing and my nephews ... Josh, Matt and Nathan you are so beautiful! Barb it was cool to be able to just hang this afternoon. There is something so safe about being "known" -this city -this country is full of kindred ones who 'I am' with. The land I am re-entrying to really isn't that yet. This is the scary part. Looks like I have a lot to walk through and begin all over again. Once again. Another new beginning is in front of me.

Im tired.
goodnight

Back Home in Cow Town ...

HEY Friends

well...i am home in calgary. arrived back here yesterday from regina.

had an absolutely amazing time with all the youth at the retreat, old friends, new friends ... the Lord moved powerfully really challenging students and adults alike to stop living our spiritual lives through our emotions. To set our affections on the things of the Lord and to commit one to another to be people who desperately call out Jesus Life over ourselves and one another. Particularly in a culture and time that is so independant and self absorbed - we need Jesus more than ever and we need community!

I really believe that roots went deep and that was my personal prayer for the weekend and all the ministry that I am putting my hands to. so needless to say in the midst of exhaustion i feel really good. my heart feels well. his voice feels very sharp to me right now. that might not make sense to many of you, but i feel like i am hearing. thank you jesus. my dependance really is in you. even in the moments of speaking truth i felt those words hitting very close to home just for me. and timely as i have launched out to the unknown.

so, here i am in calgary for a few days with epic, lifeforce, family. i pray that these days would be full of life and even in the midst of craziness and wanting to cram in as much 'people time' as possible -there would be divine moments of conversation and the ministry of your Spirit Lord.

A quick update ... travelling gypsy

Hello all ... this will be short and sweet ... here's hoping

I am currently sitting in good ole' Eston, SK. my old haunt, familiar smells, warm smiley faces and of course amazing pumpkin icecream! ok, I need to bring this back to the US of A for american thanksgiving. mmm ... well, I started the blog and then was interrupted by a very interesting late night conversation so, now here I am in Regina a few days later. Currently speaking at the Regina youth retreat. Loads of good friends -new and old - makes me miss this scene. What does that Lord have up His sleeve?

Since I left LA on Nov. 3rd I have been to Winnipeg for the 10th anniversary of the church. It was very cool to see many friends and had some great convo's with Rik/Zara, Brett/Becky, Alexandra and Joyska. Wow - I miss my friends!!!

Then I was off to Eston. Once again my old Bible College Haunts. It was interesting cause the Lord told me this past summer that I was to come to the scholl this fall and really had no clue why. It was such a fantastic few days and I was asked to speak to all the girls at the college on (drum roll please) "sexual purity". Yes, the favorite topic of sorts ... It went really well and had an opportunity to pray with quite a few girls. Since Wednesday Night I have been here in Regina and am just getting ready to head over to the church to preach it up. An amazing group of young people here - I love it!!!!

I appreciate all your prayers ... With the finishing up of the wknd. preaching at main service on sunday morning, epic on sunday night and then Lifeforce teaching all next week. It will be a very busy week!

To all of you who take the time to read this blog - please know from my heart ... I really love you. You are dear friends! I miss you and wish that we had more time to just BE with one another!

sherix
(PS. Bailey I miss you and love you! Be good;)

tick tick tickin' away ...

Tommorow I leave for the great white north. ok canada. and perhaps it is not so white -here's hopin' -but, it sure is great! i miss Canada! i miss all the ease of getting to things, finding things, not sitting in traffic, the clean air and ground ... let's see what else ... most importantly all those of you whom i love and miss. i miss you! So, here I come... i leave tommorow morning (thursday) and am going to winnipeg first off to see my grandma and all the wcv crew and then off to Eston -my old bibleschool and then Regina to preach up a storm at the youth retreat. Then of course Calgary to see my brother, family and hang with all the groovy epic posse and lifeforcer's. Last and certainly not least conclude my trip flying through Vancouver to see my parents!

This has been a good month! it hasn't been ez but, it has been good. I have a really nice place that I look forward to coming home to each day. A total blessing from the Lord! I am slowly meeting people and making friends. I look forward to that when I come back as a priority! Still trying to walk out how this all fits for me being here personally and in this emerging community but, that's ok -it is to be expected. i have a feeling that though this trip back is exciting it will also be very hard. The Lord has a few things up his sleeve - I am sure;)

My housewarming partee went really well! There were about 15 people here or so and even good ole' Kevin Friesen was here for the hang. My first Canadian visitor! Today I was out and about on my own cruisin around down Melrose ... that was fun -i got my first Hollywood haircut by Eric who is a part of basileia. Though, I was extremely freaked out ... it all went really well and eric is amazing!! I LOVE my hair!!!!! Eric if you ever read this ...you seriously rock! katie you would love eric's style ... so when you come and visit me ...hinthint ... save up it will cost you 80 smackers and that is us dolla-but, it is worth it-all the way!

Egg Nog Latte's are out! OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENT ... HEAR YE ... HEAR YE ... run out for some yuletide cheer

Prayer stuff ... Please pray for my next 2 weeks ... as I will be speaking, teaching, counseling, etc... I am looking forward to what Jesus is going to do. Please pray for provision in every way! Resource, soul, spirit, etc... that ALL the Lord desires to do in me and through me to others would happen!

Please pray for crossing the border. Even tho' I have my visa, at times these things can be a little tricky ... once again I have to do the border crossing. ick. so intimidating!

Well, my friends i am off for lime margaritas and mexican food before i finish packing!